43 posts tagged “movies”
Someone sent me a last minute Christmas email with some great 90s movies attached. I downloaded Singles and So I Married An Axe Murderer on my parents computer.
Mom: Are you having a Dan in Real Life moment, Molly?
Me: What is that?
Mom: It's this Steve Carrell movie where he goes home for the holidays and he feels like no one in his family is listening to him.
Me: I just think it's fucking horrific that every sentence I start is cut off by someo--
Step Dad: SEANA! LOOK! WE GOT A PACKAGE!
Me: Yup. Molls in Real Life.
This is the cover of the rap album I have coming out to accompany the motion picture I’m starring in. I’m playing a mislead, hardcore gangster rapper who inadvertently had chains installed where her grills were supposed to be. Because of that, I can’t actually rap, but I have earned much respect in the community anyway for both my look and dedication to the game. Then some crazy shit happens that makes up the plot of the movie. It’s pretty awesome.
Needless to say, because my character can’t actually rap, the album is just a single 48-minute track of what sounds like a deaf person crying.
via Bed Time1) This has never happened before in pictures (I pointed out that I blatantly photograph myself daily, more or less)
2) Eyes are wet and shiny thus they often appear glossy in photographs.
3) I'm apparently too old for this condition. It mainly appears in children.
I don't have eye cancer, you guys.
I'm going to keep telling myself that.
P.S. Spiegs. Sorry I called you a lesbo for liking this band. That wasn't cool or very 2008-ish of me and they are OK sometimes in the same way Dave Matthews is.
