24 posts tagged “hollywood”
Kendall is coming over tonight and we're meeting with the director of our stage show. Kendall just made a UCB Harold team, Internet. My girl's a fucking big deal. You don't even know about it. Actually, that's what I was taking her headshot for (she went with the second one, for anyone who hasn't been following in the comments).
Oh, and here's this sweet video we made about being women:
Anyway, if you're a big time Hollywood producer or director, I'd be willing to talk to you about my idea as long as we can work on my terms. If we establish what I consider to be a good relationship, I may also be willing to share with you my other ideas for motion pictures, as well as two game shows with solid internet crossover potential. Also, I have a few funny t-shirt slogans.
I just realized something that's very unique to LA and possibly NY that I don't think is true of many other places.
So, I've had the soundtrack to Bones sitting on my side table in my living room for about two weeks now, all wrapped like new in it's cellophane packaging as if I had just purchased it from the store. If that had been the case when I was living back in Massachusetts, anyone who would walk into my apartment would undoubtedly look at me and say "Bones, Molls? Really?". I mean, let's face it: It's a little bizarre for even a rap lover like me to have a shitty soundtrack to a shitty movie sitting around all brand new looking in the middle of my living room. BUT! In LA it's a totally different story because everyone who comes into my apartment most likely has a similar item in their house: a bottle of fancy, overpriced lotion, an sealed DVD copy of How to Lose a Guy In 10 Days, a mix CD of emerging local folk artists...
It's all SWAG bullshit. You go to a movie screening, a sponsored party, whatever and you get a bag of free crap. In other words, you wind up with a plethora of semi-valuable shit that completely doesn't apply to you in random stacks around your living space. The only thing I can compare this to from back home is perhaps radio station t-shirts and magnets with the phone number of your local pizza parlors.
Last night we went to St. Nick's and Bergen's.
And here's another episode of Disasterpiece Theater:
1) I am so drunk I can barely form a sentence
2) The woman comes into the bathroom and says to Ed "I thought this was a woman's room"
3) You can see this registering on my face initially, and then a moment later and then again a few more moments later.
4) In a bathroom with an echo, I start whispering "She's a bitch"
5) Ed tries to take me into the mens room, but it's occupied. Later I do go in there and it's so disgusting I decide to wait for the bitch to vacate the ladies room.
6) Why do I have to turn it into a gynecological thing? Why am I so mean?
7) NEW FRIEND TREVOR FOREVER.
Last night Ed and I went to a gay mixer Downtown. We saw our beloved Sergio. An angry gay man yelled at me because supposedly the website I work for said something shitty about one of his friends once or something.
Then we got mediocre Chinese food.
This morning I woke up early to go shoot a sketch with my friends Brian and Carlos from UCB. We filmed it at Joseph's in Hollywood. For all of you who aren't aware, Joseph's was the meeting spot for a one Miss Britney Spears and a one Mr. Kevin Elizabeth Federline. Here are the pictures from the shoot:
Then I went home to play with Wagandstuff:
Defamer livebloged the Oscars. I cut clips of the show as it was airing. Check it out here:
Liveblogging The Oscars: Choke On The Glitz
I realize I should have posted this hours ago.
I went to the CoS protest yesterday on Hollywood. I took video for work. Check it out. Crazy stuff.
That's Britney two nights ago in Hollywood. God, she's the best.
Received at 10:08 PM:
Hello,
I don't know if I'm writing
the right person for this, but I have an idea for a guaranteed sky rocketing
ratings reality show. I've faithfully watched I Love New York 1 and 2, Flavor of
Love 1 and 2, and Charm School and it's obvious America loves drama and
black women! The show would feature my friends and I who are all college
students In Tallahassee, but were born and raised in Miami, Florida. My friends
and I have been through it all. If we contacted you earlier about the show idea
some scenes would feature these issues's, school issues, undecided majors,
fights, friend betrayal, drinking, some arrests, probation,friends dating or
"hooking up" with other friends boyfriends, pregnancy scare, stripping, money
issues, fashion design, our infamous club scenes, not being able to hold down a
job. I know it sounds like a lot and that's because it is. Those are just some
of the things that goes on in our crazy college life. The show would be called
Poor Little Rich Girls. It's about a group of girls who are from Miami, a major
city, but they all attend college Florida State, FAMU, and Tallahassee Community
College, which is in Tallahassee Florida's capital and also a very boring city
and country town. We basically come and take over the city. People see us in the
streets and the clubs wearing tutu's and they think we have life made, but
in reality we don't! We struggle like no other and that's what's so funny about
the whole situation. Girls are envious of us and their men want us, that's why
we call ourselves TBN which stand for Taking Bitches Niggas, but people don't
know what it stand for ,they just here TBN an if asked what it stands for we
tell them Talented Black Nubians, very few know the real term. In the group of
friends we have a comedian with the biggest ass, Kevinique, a slut Nyeta, the
thief and mother Crystal, the man chaser Sha, the peace maker and jealous friend
with another big ass Easha, the slimy, conniving friend Sunshine and the quiet
weed head and down for whatever friend Keyondra. Behind all these girls a
lot and I mean a lot go down. Many people tell us they wish they had a video
camera and could follow our every move because they'll be rich. Sometimes at the
end of the day we say we wish America could see the BS we went through today. I
know America would want to tune in it'll be better than any reality showed aired
on any station, but Vh1 airs the best so give us a
try.
Top 5 Things I Love About Los Angeles
by Fred Armisen
1.
The Museum of Jurassic Technology in Culver City. I wish I could make
my living room look like this place. Someday. There’s no place like it
in the world. http://www.mjt.org
2. The Arclight Cinemas on Sunset. The seats are so comfortable and I love the little speech they give before each movie. http://www.arclightcinemas.com
3. In and Out Burger. As soon as I land in LA I want to go to an In and Out. I get dizzy eating their burgers. SO good.
4. Paramount Studios on Melrose. Every time I drive past the majestic gates I think “Wow, I am really in Hollywood”.
5.
The Snow White Cottages on Griffith Park Blvd. near Hyperion. Someone
told me that they were built by Disney Studios for the animators of
“Snow White”. They look like cartoon cottages, complete with tiny
windows and lumpy roofs. I feel like whoever lives there is pretty
lucky.
